Cancer

June 23-July 23

• Cardinal Water, symbolized by rivers, spigots, protection, holding and houses.
• Music gifts for Cancer: James Taylor • Cat Stevens • Aretha Franklin • Crosby, Stills & Nash • Ray Charles • Bill Withers • The Band • Grateful Dead • Gram Parsons • Rickie Lee Jones • Bonnie Raitt • Van Morrison • Barry Manilow
• Movie gifts for Cancer: Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood • Steel Magnolias • The Wizard of Oz • It’s a Wonderful Life • E.T. • The Sound of Music

If the job of Gemini is to circulate with detachment, the job of Cancer is to attach. The basic sense of trust and security derived from the Taurus attachment dynamic is amplified, sensitized and set to memory in Cancer. Whereas Taurus’s attachment impulse comes from the physical need for safety and nourishment, Cancer’s comes from the emotional need for contact and connection.

Cancer is the first water sign of the zodiac, which means it is oriented toward an emotional perspective. It represents the realization that Geminian variety and detachment are not the end-all be-all, that one has to come home, to have a place to call one’s own, a place where where shared memories live, where common ground exists, where there is a matrix in which we feel comfortable, natural, welcomed and known.

This is Cancer’s main motivation: to forge connections that provide emotional safety and nourishment. Its ruler is the Moon, which reflects the light of the Sun and is thus a kind of mirror of one’s consciousness. In psychotherapeutic  circles, we talk about the need for a mirror to affirm who we are, to validate our emotional experiences, to reflect the truth of our inner selves. In developmental psychology, this kind of attunement between parent and child is essential to the child developing the “secure base” from which a healthy, balanced ego proceeds.

In childhood, the secure base allows the youngster to explore independently, further and further from the parent, as is appropriate to her age. In the long run, the secure base provides an internal model that establishes healthy emotional expectations of relationship later in life. But if a child repeatedly feels misunderstood, she will begin to doubt she is connected and supported in the world; she will start to feel insecure about the validity of her own feelings, about her ability to evoke compassion, about whether she deserves and is able to create satisfying, healthy relationships.

Working in balance, Cancer energy generates emotional alignment – appropriate attunement, reflection and response – in order to bring about the necessary emotional connections in life. In order to do this, the native must be sensitive, intuitive and empathic to the emotional state of the other and the general “vibe” of the environment. True empathy requires imagination – that is, the ability to envision that you are living someone else’s experience, the capacity to “feel into” what the other person’s life is like. And Cancer is one of the most imaginative signs in the zodiac.

Reaching out to create emotional connections may be symbolized by the crab’s large claw and, indeed, once Cancer has found someone to hold, they are loath to let go. Memory is a powerful force; not only does Cancer hold onto tightly the memory of the initial parental attachment – that model for all future relationships – but each relationship develops its own lexicon, culture and storybook that, when it is time to let go, holds extra sway over the Cancer native that other signs may not experience so intensely. It may take Cancer types more time, more work and more energy to untwine themselves from the hold that a certain catalogue of memories has on them. Be aware of this, and give them time.

Another potential down-side of empathy is that the empath often looks outside himself to affirm his internal experience of intuition or emotion. This can be difficult because when we do this we tend – unless we are very self-protective – to give ourselves away, to invest more in other people’s experience than in our own. When we do this, we can easily get burned. In a similar vein, Cancer can be so loyal to the relationship itself – to the marriage, to the family, to the group of friends – that she is willing to give much away in order to maintain and protect it. At the base of this instinct is the sense of emotional security she gets from being part of the tightly-knit group. Yet even in the most balanced and healthy Cancer types, certainly death, divorce or disintegration in the group or relationship can hit her very hard. She will need time to recreate her identity and is likely to try and find a new relationship or group in order to do so.

These Cancerian experiences likely lead to the Cancer reputation for being withdrawn, self-protective and touchy – traits symbolized by the crab’s hard shell protecting a soft inner core. Memories are long, deep and very present with Cancer, and they are important prerequisites for making emotional judgments and decisions: The Buddhist ideal of living in the “present moment” is quite difficult to attain in this archetype, since Cancer carries all her memories with her: Past is present to this sign. Cancer types would do well to try consciously to open their claws to let old memories go, to receive back validation from others, to hold hands together as healthy equals instead of in a dependency relationship.

And, yes, dependency (even co-dependency, since it is characterized by protecting and caretaking) easily folds into this dynamic. The Cancer type can easily come to rely on affirmation and validation from others for her own sense of comfort and security, much the same way the young child looks to its parents for assurance. At some point, if she is healthy and secure, Cancer will be able to internalize the sense of validation she gets from emotionally connecting with others – and, thereby, emotionally connect with herself.

This introspection may be a healthier manifestation of the more vulnerable withdrawal instinct that we see in Cancer. Don’t automatically assume, when Cancer retreats into her shell, that she is angry or upset. She may just need some time to process feelings, to get in touch with her own thoughts, to recharge enough to move back out into the world. If she seems more centered and less needy when she returns, you’ve probably got a pretty balanced Cancer in your hands.

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Cancer energy is best balanced by its opposite sign, Capricorn. Read the description of that sign to understand what “shadow” traits you might need to integrate. Contact us at (310) 592-0435 or kathy@depthastrology.net for a detailed chart reading that reveals the entire scope of your personality, gifts and challenges.

Image: bitterjug